How do you impress a girl? A lot of guys think it’s by buying her a dozen red roses, chocolate, and extravagant gifts. But what really impresses a girl isn’t something you can buy at the store.
I met the man who became my husband in college. Neither of us had much money, but Ken really was struggling financially. He had no parental support, no financial help, and was completely on his own. While going to school full-time, he worked full-time to make ends meet.
Because of our circumstances, neither of us could afford much. We couldn’t go on crazy adventures or expensive dates. He couldn’t just show up with a dozen roses for every special occasion or date. Even going out to eat at a restaurant was a super special treat.
As I’ve written previously, I had dated guys before who bought me lots of things to make me feel special. What I loved about Ken was how money didn’t matter. He made me feel like the only girl in the room without spending a dime. He always found very creative ways to show me he was thinking about me and cared about me.
For example, early on in our relationship he ran the kitchen at the cafeteria of our college. One day they had a box of little bags of chips that were all close to their “sell by” date, so they were giving them to anyone who would take them.
Ken knew how much I loved Cool Ranch Doritos, so he snagged a whole huge box just for me. This cost him nothing but meant so much more to me than a dozen roses! It showed he knew me and what I liked and that he was thinking about me.
Even though our dates weren’t expensive, they were still wonderful. I can’t tell you how many times we just hung out at the cafeteria, or walked around campus, or just drove around talking. The time we shared together, getting to know each other, was what mattered most to me. Not how much he spent on a date.
The man who became my husband always tried to treat me when he could, but his big heart is what caught and kept my attention. He listened to me. He wanted to know who I was, what I thought, and how I felt. He appreciated me for me. The other guys may have showered me with gifts, but he showered me with love.
Don’t get me wrong, fancy dinners and the occasional splurge is fun. Five years into our marriage, we’re still just getting by. But my favorite times from when we were dating and still today are those that that don’t cost us anything. I would rather have one conversation with him about what we love, our dreams, and aspirations than all the gifts in the world.