Since I was thirteen or fourteen I have almost always been in a relationship. There was maybe like a month or two that I was single and then I would move on to another relationship, never really giving it any thought as to why I felt like I needed to be in one.
Now I’m realizing that in order to find the guy that I want I need to work on myself instead of drifting from relationship to relationship. I want to fix myself before I do get into another relationship so that I know exactly what I want and exactly what I don’t want. This will help me build my boundaries and stick with them. I don’t want to keep going through different relationships and be miserable because I feel like I haven’t had a voice in any of it.
So I made some New Year’s resolutions that will help me better my life for myself and my kids—there are so many things about myself that I do want to change.
My new goals are:
1. To quit smoking for good by the end of April.
I want to be healthier and it’s not good for anyone. I am currently reading a book about the psychological aspect of why we smoke to break that bond of needing nicotine.
2. To work out regularly.
I plan to work out at the YMCA twice a week and at my house on the days that I don’t go to the YMCA. I want to have the body that I always dreamed of.
3. To eat healthier.
Pretty much no fast food (that’s going be a hard one) except for my cheat day on Sundays.
4.To become financially stable on my own.
Create a budget to help me pay my bills on time, which will at least start the process of becoming debt free.
5. To not have a relationship until I’ve spent some time finding myself.
I don’t want to go aimlessly through life (and relationships) with no purpose or happiness. I want to start my day with meditation to help me focus on finding me.
These are just a few of them. Let’s face it, if I wrote out all of my goals for 2015 it would be a never ending list!
I have given myself a lot of goals this year that I intend to keep. I know that these are basically what a lot of people choose for the New Year, but I really want to stick to them and I will have some people keep me accountable for when I feel like it’s just too much. My friend Amber and I have already made plans to workout together at the YMCA and to meet once a week at Starbucks to ask each other how we are doing with our goals.
Sticking to these goals will teach my children that they can do anything that they set their minds to—I want to be their role model in this.
Sticking to my goals will also help me prove to myself that I don’t have to always be in a relationship in order to feel good about myself, or to have a man provide for me, or to have a happy life. A focus on being the right person will help me to find the right person. The right relationship is worth waiting for. Until then, I can and will do it on my own.
Happy New Year! What are your resolutions for 2015?