When Ken and I were first married, we thought we could never be busier, but we quickly learned to never say never. Three years later and we are busier than ever. My husband is working and going to school full-time while I stay at home with our two children both under the ages of two. Some weeks, I barely see him at all because of his hectic schedule. Things aren’t easy right now.
Sadly, we have seen life’s busyness cause division, separate couples, and ultimately destroy families. A healthy marriage leads to a healthy family. Although the busyness of life has only made it more difficult to keep our marriage healthy, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. My husband is a few short months away from finishing school! We hope that life will become a little easier. In the meantime, we’re doing our best to maintain a healthy family life until he has a bit more freedom. Here are three things we learned that help keep our relationship strong during this busy time in our lives.
1. Communication is Key
When life is hectic and there are many days when our time together is limited, it is essential that we communicate. When either of us is feeling overwhelmed, we both know that we always have our best friend to turn to. We never judge each other; we lean on each other. We know each other better than anyone else and have learned to listen and talk to each other effectively. The strong friendship we have built is what allows us to withstand the trials and hardships that life sometimes throws at us.
2. Make Time for Quality Time
Quality time together is one of the greatest tools to build up our marriage. My husband and I see even the most routine chores as an opportunity to bond with each other.We go grocery shopping together. We go to the bank, or pick up food, or just drive around town together-usually blasting music and singing along as we go.
We don’t force each other to do anything. If my husband brings up going out with his friends I am the first one to encourage that, but at the end of the day we truly are each other’s best friends and we want to be with each other.
3. Have a joyful spirit
Joking and always finding an opportunity to have fun helps my husband and I keep our connection. We will wrestle with each other, poke fun at each other, and get each other laughing until our belly’s hurt. It is very important to let loose and make sure you can have fun. Keeping a joyful spirit between the two of us grows the intimacy in our marriage.
I can already look at my son and see how beneficial it is to him to see his parents so happy and having fun. Even at a year and a half old, he is already developing a great sense of humor and joyful spirit from what he observes us. Our desire to have fun and laugh, even in the difficult times, has helped us grow closer and build up our family.
As busy as we are, I look back at where we started three years ago when we got married. Despite how chaotic our lives are, we are closer than we have ever been. Life is about learning to enjoy every step of the way –no matter how busy or hard it might be. Therefore, strive to communicate effectively, spend quality time with the people you love, and have fun throughout the journey!
A lot of people look at us like we are crazy. Maybe they’re right, but at least we are crazy together!