Like many girls, I spent time in my high school and college years imagining who my future husband would be, what he would look like, and what kind of personality he would have. I even created a “Husband List” of all of the characteristics I was looking for in a man: lover of children, man of faith, great sense of humor, smart and so on. But I’m so thankful I left room for someone even better than what I dreamed up.
As I got to know my husband, Adam, I was blown away by how well he matched what I was looking for in a future husband. He even came from a big family (I was determined to have sisters one way or another)!
And yet, there were some, well, unexpected qualities. My husband is a Marine scout sniper, has a tattoo, and owns a motorcycle. To most people, this isn’t a big deal. But To me these details signified a “rebel” or “bad boy,” two traits I knew I wouldn’t be attracted to! If you would have told my 21-year-old self back in the spring of 2007 that in a week I’d meet my future husband and that he’d be a sniper with a tattoo and motorcycle, I would have probably laughed and said, “You don’t know me at all.” I’m sure my friends would have laughed, too.
People say, “If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans” Yep, God is definitely laughing with this one. But I’m okay with that.
I know there is no such thing as a perfect person, but every day I’m more and more convinced that Adam is exactly who I’m supposed to be with. He can’t wait to get home each day to play with our children, he challenges me to become a better person, he puts his faith in God above all else, and he can make me laugh like no one else. Adam is so much better than I ever dreamed of, tattoo, motorcycle, sniper skills and all. In fact, without these traits my husband wouldn’t be the man I know and love today.
I don’t believe in the saying that “love is blind,” but that it has some sort of visual impairment? Most definitely. Having a list is important (my list even included a few “non-negotiables”), but it’s also important not to get so focused on a list that we miss the opportunity of an actual person. My life has been greatly blessed because I gave Adam a chance. Marriage has been so much more of an adventure because of him and, while I knew it would be wonderful, it’s so much better than I expected.
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