After my last bad date, I was starting to think that gentlemen are nowhere to be found in this day and age. But one man showed me how wrong I was. He showed me that when I set clear expectations, there are still guys out there who will happily rise to the occasion.
A guy that I knew from a while back started to write me on Facebook a few weeks ago. He wanted to know if I would be interested in going out on a date with him. A little worried about his expectations, I told him “no.” But he was persistent; so after talking with some friends and family I finally decided to say “yes” and go on a date with him.
I’m glad I said yes! He was a perfect gentleman! I have never been on a date where the guy opened doors and was so extremely polite. We went out to eat and to a haunted house. While at the haunted house he asked if he could hold my hand so that we didn’t get separated. I thought that it was cute! He never tried to put any moves on me and hugged me at the end of the night. Needless to say, it was a really good date.
So why did this date turn out so differently than my last one?
Well, aside from the fact that he is clearly a good guy, I think the fact that I set up clear expectations before the date really helped this date go so well. Before the date, I had told him up front that I was trying to change myself, and I had standards. I would not kiss him or have sex on the first date.
I also had told him that my kids come first no matter what and that if he was interested in me, he would have to take it very slow. I explained that I was not dating to just have fun; I was looking for a good husband. Sure, this guy could have changed his mind and decide he didn’t want to take me out if there wouldn’t be sex—but then that would just mean I wouldn’t waste my evening on a guy who isn’t really interested in getting to know me. But that didn’t happen, he agreed to my terms whole-heartedly!
This date taught me that there are still good guys out there, men who are willing to wait and respect you. I know now that setting my standards higher can help me find the kind of guy who could be a potential husband.