After my abusive relationship ended, I don’t think I really knew what I was looking for in life. I thought that I could have fun only if there were endless parties to attend and endless invites. I felt that I only needed someone to tag along.
I realized I needed to date and explore. I had always dated people that I met through friends but decided to give online dating a try because I wanted to get out of my comfort zone. One guy’s online profile made him seem like a great catch: the right age, the looks, and the career, everything seemed great.
I decided to meet him for dinner. When he arrived he was not the person in the picture, he definitely wasn’t the age he listed in his profile, and he was not even close to the person he represented himself to be. My stomach sank.
It was clear to both of us that this date wouldn’t lead to another one, but I learned something from that date. As I sat there having dinner with this much older gentleman, I really enjoyed our conversation.
He demonstrated sincere interest in someone else other than himself. I felt at ease and like there was no pressure to be perfect or fight for attention.
My eyes were opened. I realized that what I wanted was someone with whom I could do everyday things and enjoy them. I didn’t want someone that would just party with me. I wanted to find someone I could enjoy every aspect of life with. I wanted someone I could laugh with and truly feel like myself.
Online dating didn’t lead me to meet someone, but it did lead me to believe that I could meet someone to share my whole life with. I didn’t need someone who just wanted to see one side of me or just know me at a surface level. I wanted a greater connection. I ended up finding my dreams in the man who was my best friend. But that wouldn’t have happened if I didn’t experience this date.
There are many stories out there about worst dates and I thought this would be one of them. It turned into the best date not because it lead to a relationship but because it lead to discovering what I truly wanted.
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