Yet another one of my friends has plastered couple photos of their undying love all over social media.
They must be doing something right, spouts my critical inner voice. It’s easy to worry that I’ll never be so lucky. It’s easy to doubt love.
I’d be lying if I say that my didn’t eyes linger on their interlocked fingers for a little longer than I’d like to admit. And fear bubbles inside me, that I won’t find someone’s hand to hold.
In those moments, I just want someone—anyone—to make me feel like the only person in the world. And I think a lot of the people in my small college town seem to feel the same way. If they aren’t dating someone from their hometown, they are having random drunken hookups on the weekends, or playing the texting game with strangers on Tinder.
But I know hooking up can be just as lonely as being alone. I’ve seen friends with strings of random guys who come out confused and hurt. Dates become ghosts when they don’t respond. Modern dating makes it so easy to fake detachment behind a screen, behind your smiling pictures.
I believe there’s a better way to meet people than by swiping left or right on pictures and perusing carefully crafted bios on my phone in the dark. I believe I shouldn’t be in a relationship for its own sake, for the happy couple photos or the fancy date nights. I want be in a relationship with someone because I truly care about him and because our time together makes us better people than we were before.
I know that’s worth it. I know what I’m worth. I shouldn’t settle for anything less just to have someone next to me.
In the meantime, I’m finding ways to love and be loved whether I’m in a relationship or not. I spend time with friends and family, throw myself into writing. When I get lonely, I try to keep my hope afloat. I remind myself that there’s no pressure to have my love life figured out at the same time as everyone else. And remind myself that I’m not the only one doesn’t.
Even when it seems hopeless, I know that real love is possible. It’s what I (and you) deserve. And its worth waiting for.
- I Believe In Love Because Love Is What We All Deserve - July 10, 2018