My boyfriend and I have been spending a lot of time studying at coffee shops. We’re often found sharing a table at Barnes and Noble, which has basically become a new home away from home.
During one of our study sessions we were taking a little break and I was talking to him about some random thing – honestly it was probably about a dog meme I had seen.
While I was sharing about this hilarious doggo, I noticed he was very tuned in to his phone. I figured he probably wasn’t listening very closely, but I didn’t mind since I didn’t think what I was saying was very important, so I kept talking anyways.
When I trailed off, he slowly looked at me sheepishly. He admitted he actually hadn’t heard what I had said. He told me he thought he could multitask, but he realized in this moment that he wasn’t as good as he thought. He apologized for not listening to me and asked what I had been talking about.
To be honest, I wasn’t surprised that he hadn’t heard what I had said. However, I was surprised that he was taking his response to a trivial conversation so seriously.
Even though I hadn’t thought it was a big deal at first, his thoughtful response got me thinking.
It meant the world to me that he didn’t just nod and mumble “mhm” and let the moment pass. It was such a tiny exchange, but it was such a huge expression of respect and love for me.
He respected my thoughts enough to apologize for not paying attention, then gave me his full attention when he asked what I’d been talking about.
Sometimes it’s easy for me to overlook small interactions like this because they appear so insignificant at first glance. But the way my boyfriend is attentive to these small moments is how he shows his love for me.
I know that if he thinks it’s important to listen to me share about a meme he is also going to want to pay attention fully when I need to talk about something serious. In giving me his attention fully in both the little and big things he shows me that he wants all of who I am – the silly, boring, joyful, and deep.