I really dislike digging around in the basement by my husband’s work bench. It’s covered in nails, saws, hammers, and other items I’m always afraid I will accidentally cut myself on.
Yet, that’s where I found myself one morning last week. I really wanted to hang a few pictures on my walls, but the frames needed hanging hardware first. I could have waited for my husband to get home from work, but I didn’t have the patience that day.
As I sifted through my husband’s wrenches, screwdrivers, and bolts looking for a drill bit, I definitely felt frustrated. I felt resourceful and creative. I was getting a task done that I would normally rely on him to complete. Most of all, I felt empowered.
It took some effort and a Youtube video tutorial, but an hour later I could look at my wall with pride. I had hung everything myself.
I think strength is a defining quality of women. It took strength, for example, to step outside of my comfort zone and try something new, like independently using power tools. And in this instance, I relied on my own determination and stubbornness to mine my strength. But at other times I’ve been uncertain about my own strength.
Childbirth is a good example of this. After each of my children was born, I have never felt stronger. I felt I could conquer anything. Yet, I remember that throughout the labor I needed my husband not only for physical support during contractions, but for emotional support when I wanted to say, “I can’t do this. I give up.” He’d keep reminding me that I was doing it, that I was stronger than him, and that he was so proud of me. I drew strength from his strength and together we’ve brought three new children into the world.
So often I want to refuse help, believing I can accomplish everything entirely on my own. But I know how much I need my husband, just like he needs me. Could I have made it through childbirth without my husband? I know many women do. But having his support and help meant the world to me. There is no way I’d be as strong as I am without his love, encouragement, and faith in me. He feels the same way about me. We are stronger together.