New Years Resolutions For My Marriage

A new year is upon us. For many it is a time to look back at where we’ve been and how far we’ve come. It’s also an opportunity to dream about where we’d like to be when the new year ends again.

Kara and Adam on their wedding day.
Kara and Adam on their wedding day.

Most New Year’s resolutions center around getting to the gym more, eating healthier, and maybe knocking one or two things off of our bucket list. I’m not the best at making – or keeping – New Year’s resolutions. Usually that’s because I decide to make one on January 3rd or 4th and I’m too tempted not to keep it when I’ve already missed a few days.

But this year Adam and I have decided to try something different. We’ve made resolutions for our relationship. For whatever reason much of December was spent having frank conversations about where we are in our relationship and where we could improve. These conversations have been painful at times, but oh so beautiful and hopeful as well. They led us to set practical goals for where we want to be at the end of 2015, as well as concrete ways to reach them.

1.) More alone time together. This seems like a no brainer, but with two small kids and one income, it can be hard to come by. However, finding that alone time to reconnect, talk (without interruption) and have adventures is so important in keeping the flames burning. We’ve tried committing to one date a month in the past, but we seem to remember it once every four months. Thankfully, beginning in January we’ve set up a babysitting swap with another couple. Once a month each couple will get to go on a date while the other watches their kids. For other nights of the month where we just need an “at home” date, we’re hoping to get a couple new games this Christmas to add to our small collection.

2.) Pray together more. Since the very beginning of our relationship Adam and I have prayed together. However, since having kids our prayer time together has become family prayer time. That’s good, but we have more we want to pray about as a couple, without little ears around. We’re trying to build some couple prayer time into our day after the kids go to sleep, but also before we head to bed because once our heads hit the pillow sleep comes pretty quickly.

3.) Bring more order to our home. Order in our home brings peace to our relationship and our family. We live in a small home and somehow we’ve accumulated more stuff than we need. Sadly, I’ve allowed myself to get caught up in trying to make my home look this way or that way instead of organizing it in a way that works for my family. I’ve already walked Adam through the rooms letting him know what I want to throw out, donate or move to a different room. Thankfully, he totally agrees with my vision and we’ll start enacting the plans in the New Year.

As 2014 draws to a close, I’m in awe of all the wonderful memories the year brought. It’s humbling to look back and see how far Adam and I have come, even in just a year! Hopefully 2015 will bring much of the same, or more!

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