Sharing Love and Basketball

I’m embarrassed to say that my wife beat me in basketball on one of our first dates. I’m not embarrassed because she’s a girl, but more because I’m taller, faster, have a higher vertical, and am generally just more of an athlete (no offense dear). What I didn’t realize is that this sweet, innocent woman turns into Dennis Rodman on the basketball court.

Here’s a word to the wise, unless you have a pretty good health insurance plan, DO NOT challenge my wife to a basketball game. It might as well have been a UFC fight with the elbows and knees she was throwing, about half way through the game I quit thinking about winning and started thinking about surviving. She’s probably written this off as an excuse for why I lost, but trust me, I’m just thankful to be here today.

Adam and his wife Kara competing in an obstacle race together.
Adam and his wife Kara competing in an obstacle race together.

At first glance this story may seem to have more to do with wounded ego than love, but the fact is, that first game of basketball was actually my first step toward truly sharing a life together. The truth is, I hate basketball. I was a wrestler, and although athletic, I tend to do poorly with sports that involve balls. But, while I’ve never really had an interest in basketball, I knew that to love Kara meant to come to know and at least appreciate the things that she loves. And she’s done the same for me. Kara has gone to multiple wrestling meets, she asks me about the books I’m reading, and she’s willing to try camping as a family.

Common interests are vital to a healthy relationship, because they provide an opportunity for a couple to build a friendship based on shared goals that extend beyond their romantic commitment. I’m not saying couples should be identical—every individual needs some room to be him/herself—and yet I do think that getting to know the other person’s interests is a vital stage in the growth of love. In fact, as our relationship has grown so have I. Now I get excited about our local basketball team’s games and watching March Madness, I think I know half of the rules. I’ve become invested not so much in basketball but in Kara, and that has led me to the court.

Maybe your significant other is into cooking, sports, video games, or some other hobby that you know nothing about. It might not be important to you, but your significant other is. So for the sake of the other try learning about their hobbies too. I’m willing to bet that if you do you’ll find some redeeming qualities, and I’m certain that you’ll grow in love!

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