I remember the moment in crystal clear detail. A couple weeks into our relationship, my boyfriend and I were driving somewhere when I looked over and casually- but meaningfully-said, “You’re so handsome.”
He instantly lit up inside, but then suddenly got this funny look on his face as he turned to me and said, “No one has ever told me that before, except my mom or maybe a friend once.”
And that’s when the light bulb went off in my head: guys need to hear compliments too! Words of Affirmation are ways to express love, it’s when we use language to remind—or affirm—our love ones of their good qualities. When it comes to words of affirmation especially regarding appearances, much of the focus is on women. Many women need to be told they’re beautiful, and I am among them. But I had never thought about guys needing to hear compliments on their physical appearance too!
This got me thinking about the power of words. Words have power, and I firmly believe love is the strongest force in the world. When you link words and love together, magic happens. Why? Because although you might be thinking all these wonderful things about someone, it should be shared with the other because good things are meant to be shared! And compliments are one of those good things.
This point about the power of words was driven home just the other day when I realized that I was feeling slightly off in our relationship. I knew nothing major had happened, but still I felt that something was missing. As funny as it sounds, I realized that the cause of my frustration was our recent overuse of emoticons in our text messages.
Incredibly convenient, but also very shallow, I realized that the use of pictures had replaced all the wonderful words that could have been used to express our feelings. Sure a picture is worth a thousand words, but if you truly love someone, why not say those words? (If need be, tailored to a 150 character text message of course!)
When I voiced this concern to my boyfriend, we had to laugh a little. I know he loves me and vice versa. But it’s funny how a pixilated emoticon cannot replace the power of words used to express those feelings.
So instead of keeping those compliments inside your head, share them with him or her! It doesn’t have to be an elaborate monologue, powerful feelings can be expressed in the simplest of terms. But we should never be afraid to utilize one of love’s most powerful expressions: words.
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