We have all heard the sad news about Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin’s separation. Divorce is always sad and celebrity breakups are no different. But in a recent article in Verily Magazine, editor Mary Rose Somarriba, shows us that there are lessons we can learn from celebrity separations and apply them to our own marriages.
“Certainly every marriage and relationship is unique, and no outsider can say with true certainty what exactly caused the separation of any couple,” explains Mary Rose. “But we do know what components are essential for couples to keep a healthy relationship…”.
Mary Rose draws out 2 lessons we can learn from various celebrity relationships and apply them to our own relationships:
Marriage requires intention, purposefully setting aside time to spend quality time with one another. Being intentional about how we spend our time will safeguard against letting our work and our adoring public pull us apart. For celebrities, it’s easy for their careers and press tours to get in the way of their relationships. Mary Rose points to the demise of Katy Perry’s split with Russell Brand as an example of this kind of disastrous distraction. In Katy Perry’s 2012 autobiographical film Part of Me, Mary Rose points to how we are given an intimate look at how “…Katy got sucked in by all the attention and started prioritizing her work and fame over time with her husband.” We may not be celebrities like Katy Perry and Russell Brand, but we know how easy it is for our jobs and crazy schedules to get in the way.
It’s one thing to talk the talk, and quite another to walk the walk. When it comes down to it, we need to be able to make tough decisions to put our marriage first. Mary Rose points to stars like Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddie Prinze Jr, who prioritize their marriage over movie parts–avoiding roles that would keep them apart.
How often do we have to deal with friends or even family getting too involved in our marriages? But marriage should be a place of trust and we often need to protect that trust with privacy. Couples therapist, Zach Brittle, explains the idea that healthy marriages should be like a house with windows and walls. “… in healthy committed relationships, partners have windows into one another’s lives and walls around the relationship as a whole, Zach explains. “The walls are designed to protect (not isolate) the relationship by providing appropriate boundaries.
“Mary Rose points to celebrities Gwen Stefani, as an example of how important it is to take action to protect your marriage. Mary Rose explains that in an interview with Glamour Magazine, Gwen Stefani refused to comment about her marriage with husband, rockstar Gavin Rosdale. Gwen told Glamour “I don’t really like talking about Gavin because, why would I do that? It’s the one place you need to really protect yourself: your family and your marriage.”
Celebrity breakups reminds us, that money and fame can’t buy you love, and that relationships take hard work!